📝 Model answerBand 8274 words

Band 8 model answer

A model answer written to illustrate a Band 8 response to this question, with the rubric breakdown and what carries it. Written by us as a teaching example, not a verified exam script.

Some argue widespread CCTV cameras make cities safer; others say they invade privacy. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Overall

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Task response

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Coherence & cohesion

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Lexical resource

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Grammar

The proliferation of CCTV cameras throughout public space has ignited considerable debate. Some maintain that pervasive surveillance renders cities safer; others decry it as an intolerable encroachment on privacy. This essay discusses both positions before offering my own.

Advocates dwell on the contribution cameras make to public safety. Their mere presence can dissuade prospective offenders, who think twice when they know they are observed, while the footage they yield proves invaluable in identifying suspects and securing convictions. In thronged city centres and transport hubs, surveillance also enables the authorities to respond swiftly to accidents, brawls or emergencies, occasionally saving lives, and for countless ordinary citizens the cameras are simply a source of reassurance.

Opponents of mass surveillance, however, warn of a grievous cost to liberty. When people are filmed wherever they venture, they argue, society slides towards a condition in which every citizen is implicitly treated as a suspect. There is, moreover, the peril that the data amassed will be abused, whether by governments bent on monitoring lawful dissent or by individuals who secure illicit access to it. Perpetual observation, critics contend, exerts a chilling effect on the spontaneity and privacy on which a free society depends.

In my opinion, a reasonable equilibrium is both attainable and necessary. CCTV in genuinely public, high-risk locations seems a prudent precaution, provided its operation is bound by stringent rules governing how footage is retained, accessed and ultimately destroyed. What must be resisted is unregulated, indiscriminate surveillance answerable to no one.

In conclusion, while CCTV can plainly bolster safety, it demands careful constraint, and I believe that targeted, accountable use strikes the soundest balance between security and privacy.

✅ What carries it
  • Covers both sides and supplies a clear, qualified opinion that proposes a workable compromise.
  • Each view is developed with concrete reasoning, from deterrence and evidence to data abuse and chilling effects.
  • Confident collocation and phrasing: “an intolerable encroachment on privacy”, “a chilling effect”, “indiscriminate surveillance”.
  • Well-managed paragraphs and accurate, varied sentence structure.
⚠️ What keeps it from higher
  • The call for “stringent rules” would be stronger if it briefly identified who should enforce and audit them.
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