Band 8 model answer
A model answer written to illustrate a Band 8 response to this question, with the rubric breakdown and what carries it. Written by us as a teaching example, not a verified exam script.
“The diagram shows the stages in the production of chocolate.”8
Overall
8
Task response
8
Coherence & cohesion
8
Lexical resource
8
Grammar
The diagram illustrates the process by which cacao pods are transformed into finished chocolate bars ready for sale.
Overall, the process is linear and consists of nine main stages, beginning with the harvesting of cacao pods from trees and ending with moulded chocolate bars that are cooled and ready for packaging.
Initially, cacao pods are harvested from the trees. The pods are then split open and the beans, along with the surrounding white pulp, are scooped out. At this stage, the beans and pulp are placed in containers and left to ferment for approximately one week, a process that develops their characteristic flavour. After fermentation, the beans are spread out and dried in the sun to reduce their moisture content.
Once dried, the beans are roasted to deepen the flavour. The outer shells are subsequently removed to leave the cocoa nibs inside. These nibs are then ground into a smooth liquid paste, known as cocoa mass or chocolate liquor. In the next stage, sugar and milk are added to the liquid and blended in to create the desired taste and consistency. Finally, the mixture is poured into moulds and cooled until it solidifies into bars, completing the production process.
- •Overview clearly identifies the process as linear, states the number of stages, and marks both the starting material (cacao pods) and the finished product (chocolate bars).
- •All nine stages are covered in the correct order, including the fermentation duration of approximately one week.
- •Passive voice is used accurately and consistently: 'are harvested', 'are scooped out', 'are roasted', 'are added', 'is poured'.
- •Varied sequencing language: 'initially', 'at this stage', 'once dried', 'subsequently', 'finally'.
- •Briefly naming the intermediate product as 'cocoa mass or chocolate liquor' in parentheses is accurate, but a single term would keep the register more uniformly formal.
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