📝 Model answerBand 8307 words

Band 8 model answer

A model answer written to illustrate a Band 8 response to this question, with the rubric breakdown and what carries it. Written by us as a teaching example, not a verified exam script.

Some believe celebrities are poor role models for young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

8

Overall

8

Task response

8

Coherence & cohesion

8

Lexical resource

8

Grammar

The question of whether celebrities constitute poor role models for young people has sharpened considerably in the age of social media, when the lives of famous individuals are visible in real time and at extraordinary scale. I largely agree that celebrities as a class make unreliable models for emulation, though the case warrants more precision than a blanket condemnation.

The concerns about celebrity influence are grounded in observable patterns. Fame in contemporary culture is disproportionately concentrated in entertainment and sport, industries that reward extraordinary natural gifts rather than the sustained, disciplined effort that determines outcomes for most young people. A teenager who internalises the idea that success arrives through viral exposure or athletic talent rather than through persistent application is acquiring a framework poorly suited to navigating ordinary ambition. Beyond the aspiration problem, the conduct of highly visible celebrities, reckless spending, troubled personal relationships, public controversies, is documented in ways that amplify behaviour that would be unremarkable in a private individual.

It would be unfair, however, to characterise all celebrity influence as negative. Many public figures use their platforms to advocate for education, mental health awareness or civic engagement with considerable reach and genuine effect. Athletes who speak openly about professional failure and recovery, or musicians who credit disciplined daily practice for their success, can model resilience in ways that resonate with audiences who might resist conventional guidance.

The deeper problem, I would argue, is selectivity of exposure. Young people tend to encounter the consumption and glamour of celebrity life without seeing the mundane competence and sustained work that typically underlies it. The influence of celebrities is not inherently harmful, but it is structurally incomplete.

In conclusion, celebrities are more often inadequate role models than actively harmful ones; the solution lies less in restricting their influence than in cultivating critical media literacy in young audiences.

✅ What carries it
  • The 'structurally incomplete' framing in the penultimate paragraph is analytically sharp and moves the argument beyond a simple good/bad binary.
  • The essay sustains its qualification throughout, 'largely agree', 'more often inadequate than actively harmful', demonstrating controlled nuance.
  • Counterexamples of positive celebrity influence are credible and specific rather than vague.
  • Varied sentence length and structure maintains engagement without sacrificing formal register.
⚠️ What keeps it from higher
  • The conclusion's recommendation about media literacy, though sound, is introduced very briefly and could have been foreshadowed earlier in the essay.
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