Band 8 model answer
A model answer written to illustrate a Band 8 response to this question, with the rubric breakdown and what carries it. Written by us as a teaching example, not a verified exam script.
“The diagram shows how aluminium drinks cans are recycled and remanufactured.”8
Overall
8
Task response
8
Coherence & cohesion
8
Lexical resource
8
Grammar
The diagram illustrates the process by which used aluminium cans are collected, recycled, and converted into new cans ready for consumers.
Overall, the process is broadly cyclical and consists of approximately nine main stages, beginning with the collection of used cans from homes and ending with new cans being shipped back to consumers, with the complete loop taking around 60 days.
Initially, used cans are collected from households and transported to a sorting facility, where materials are separated. The aluminium cans are then shredded into small flakes and thoroughly cleaned to remove any contaminants. Once the flakes have been cleaned, they are fed into a furnace and melted at approximately 700 degrees Celsius.
The molten aluminium is subsequently cast into solid ingots, which are then rolled under pressure into thin, flat sheets. At this stage, the sheets are pressed and shaped into new cans. Finally, the cans are filled, sealed, and shipped back to retailers and consumers. Because the entire process from collection to the point of sale takes only around 60 days, the cycle can repeat rapidly, making aluminium one of the most efficiently recycled materials available.
- •Clear overview that identifies the cyclical nature, approximate number of stages, and the 60-day timeframe before any detail is given.
- •Consistent and accurate use of the present simple passive throughout: 'are collected', 'are shredded', 'is melted', 'are cast', 'are rolled'.
- •Wide range of sequencing language: 'initially', 'once', 'subsequently', 'at this stage', 'finally'.
- •All key stages are covered in the correct order, including the specific 700-degree furnace temperature.
- •The transition between the sorting and shredding steps could be slightly more explicit to signal those as distinct stages.
Write your own. Get a real band read.
Reading a model answer only takes you so far. Write your own response to this question and we’ll grade it against the four official rubrics, the same way we scored this one.
Attempt this question